what i've been feeling

It was a schooling day today despite it being a Saturday. I never really agreed on having school replacements on Saturdays because half of the school's population will be missing. And I had to drag myself out of my comfy bed today only to be greeted by 9 students in my class. I applaud their effort to come to school, really. I would have wrapped myself even deeper in the comfort of my blanket if I were a student myself.

There were times when I heard myself let a huge sigh of relief when some students were absent for the day. These noted students are the disruptive, difficult ones who more often than not really test my patience and my credibility. Many times I would prefer not to deal with them in class as that would definitely save me from all the bitterness and remorse.

There is a clear, definite line between a student being naughty and a student being unacceptably rude. Most of the time, I don't mind the naughty ones because they are just being who they are (in fact I quite enjoy their put ups and their ridiculously hilarious behaviour) and as a student back then, I was naughty myself. But I was never rude. If there is one thing that really set the time bomb in me, that would be rudeness. And that's when I really lost it.

The students in the latter group can really make me feel so angry with their 'selamba' face and 'selamba' attitude that it made me even furious when they talk back. You'd be surprise with how down they can make you feel and how brave of them to say certain things straight to your face and the satisfaction in their faces which send the message "you got served!". Can you imagine?

I wonder can a student or students appear to be so despicable to a teacher's eyes?

No, I am not to the point of despising any student yet although one student almost make it to the list. That is another long story which will take forever but (thankfully) I share the same fury with another teacher who is also teaching the student.

I just wish that I don't have to deal with the same disrespectful students on a daily basis. It drains all energy and the good spirit in me. I fear of getting old before time. They cause so much headache that you have to excuse me when there are times that it seems like I am PMSing sentiasa.

So people, stop saying accusingly that a teacher's job is so damn easy because you have no idea what we are dealing with in school. You have no idea, really.

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The Writer

The Writer
I am a wife, a mother, and a teacher by profession. At times a pessimist and one who is easily amused. I find comfort once entering the threshold of my bedroom. I write because I want to and it makes me feel good :)