Raising our children

I came across a video today on 'Raising a newborn in Islam' by Sheikh Shady Alsuleiman, posted by a group I subscribed on Facebook.

It is such a beautiful lecture on parents' responsibilities towards our children which we might already be well aware of, but delivered in such a way that it struck every chord in my body. It made me think hard about what I have done so far to raise my son and which path am I leading him to. 

Subhanallah, such an eye-opener and very inspiring. Makes me want to be better and better for the sake of my children and also to contribute to the upbringing of the ummah in general.

Do have a watch, you will gain more than what you expect, I assure you. Anyway, here are some of the important points that I really like to share from the lecture :

Allah doesn't simply delight us with a beautiful, healthy child, but for us to be responsible of his upbringing, providing him/her to the path of Allah SWT
Behind every great nikmah is a great test. When Allah grant you a child (nikmah), it is to see what you are going to do with him/her (test). Parents are responsible for their children's upbringing, providing them to the path of Allah and seeking His pleasure
The money and time you spent on your family and children are the most well-spent and will definitely benefit their proper upbringing
 Babies are born Islam, but more often than not parents tend to change their children's religion through their upbringing
Children's  greatest role-models are their parents so we must teach them the goodness and the love for Allah SWT and Muhammad SAW so that they grow up knowing about Islam
We need to be more cautious of what we do/say in front of our children than in front of strangers

Let us strive to better ourselves so that we can be great role models to our children, insyaAllah! I pray that our jihad in raising our children the right way will be eased and guided and may Allah be pleased with what we are striving for, ameen!

school's out!


The holidays are here! It's time for the deserved break although I know most teachers don't really detach themselves from school and its never ending mounting work. In fact, school holidays are no longer in its truest sense for teachers.

As for me, I am trying to rest and enjoy the one week holiday as much as I can although I have all the reasons to use this break to complete my work before I go for my looked forward maternity leave (yeay!). The thing is, I just can't bring myself to start work. I am not joking when I say everytime I face my laptop, my contraction (Braxton Hicks) will start. Everytime. No kidding. It's like the little one is not allowing me to work but to pay attention to her instead - which I have no problem at all (hehe!)

But of course, I had to pull myself out OF this lazy cocoon as I don't have any other time. Plus, it's the waiting game for me as I might go into labour anytime now (scary!). Just thinking about it gives me shivers. I guess I am not that ready yet. 

Anyway, Happy Holidays to my fellow comrades who I believe are enjoying their family time everywhere around the country or out of the country. As for me, I am enjoying my stay at home mostly. Trust me, it's the best place a pregnant lady like me would like to be. Such a comforting nest! 

Confusion

I am sure we all have our own endearments towards our spouse. Likewise, we too have ours but nothing mushy.

Much to my husband's initial dismay, I call him bb. It all began with the Giuliana & Bill show where Giuliana calls her husband booboo. I thought it was cute and I recalled jokingly calling  my husband bb which sticks until now. 

In time, he thought it's cute too and he approves.

Until recently, I realised that it's going to pose problems. One day, I called my husband "Bb!" and guess who responded?

Our bibik. Exactly.

I didn't know how to react when she was already by my side. I was puzzled and I could tell she was, too, when I told her it was my husband I was calling for.

Man, I couldn't contain my furious laughter. On another occasion, we were in the car. My husband was driving and the car in front of us showed signs of braking suddenly so I squeaked, "Bb!" And guess who responded again?

Bibik.

Crossroads.

I really don't want to call my husband by other names. And I also think bibik suits her fine.

I guess I have to make it loud and clear then : "BibiKKKKKKKKK!" with a Qalqalah.

13 months

That's how long Luqman's been fully breastfed, alhamdulillah. I never thought that we would have come that far but we did. You'd know that I had stopped pumping at the 10th month due to my pregnancy and alhamdulillah for the sufficient EBM that Luqman still got to taste Ummi's golden liquid up until he turned a year. To be able to provide him for such a period of time is more than enough and I am more than thankful for the opportunity and experience. My breastfeeding journey with Luqman is definitely challenging but it is priceless and beautifully charted nonetheless. The bond is just unexplainable and I would never trade that for anything else.

It was never easy getting over the fact that he is no more exclusively breastfed, but I believe in God's doing. 2 weeks before the last packet of EBM was consumed, I was in a state of a tangled mind. Breastfeeding mums would understand that feeling. I wanted the best for my dear son. Yes, fresh milk is now an option but I told myself, there's no harm in trying to get the best option. 

So, I decided to search for a wet nurse (ibu susuan). My husband was more than supportive while my parents weren't too keen. To cut things short, everything was eased. Allah showed me the way and he granted me one. I can never be more thankful for such rezeki. 

She is a dear friend and a sister whom I have long known and we are closely acquainted. She had just given birth at that time and I approached her. Her respond was that of a big fat yes that I was overwhelmed for a while. Alhamdulillah. My worries were immediately swept away. 

Luqman's ibu susuan - Kak Azlina and her son, Ali

However, God has better plans. After almost a month providing for Luqman, she told me that she can no longer do so. I respect her decision and her reasons and the fact that she felt sadder than I was just made me cry. Such a beautiful soul and I thanked her from the bottom of my heart for even willing to share her milk with my son.

Luqman with his little 'brother', Ali

So yes, I still breastfeed him; occasional breastfeeding, if there is such term. He now drinks fresh goat milk. Everyone knows it's the second best after mum's. Alhamdulillah, Luqman doesn't seem to reject it and so far he has developed no allergies whatsoever. And alhamdulillah, too that he doesn't show any signs of weaning. He is still attracted to Ummi's hehe

I plan to continue breastfeeding him even after I have delivered. Hopefully up until he is 2 years. I know my journey will be more challenging after this, nursing two child at once. But I am up for it. InsyaAllah everything will be eased and I pray that I will be able to provide the best to the both of them and that Allah will grant me sufficient golden liquid, amin!

To all breastfeeding mums out there, don't quit! Yes, it is never easy but do it for our babies :)

A prolonged sickness

This week had been hectic. Work is neverending and time is always running. I have never felt so tired physically and mentally (especially) that I didn't do my body justice. Poor baby inside, berjihad bersama Ummi. To top it off, I am still recuperating from my ill-being as mentioned in my previous post.

I am still trying to eat right, properly adjusting my appetite. I really want to eat but I can just wish as much. I'd be lucky if I don't throw up the minute food enters my stomach. It's like my tummy and food are carrying negative charges; they don't jive. It struck me as weird that I had to go through this during my last weeks of pregnancy considering that I have had a breezy first 2 trimesters. And now hubby is joining the bandwagon of the 'tummyache'. Poor him. He, too, can't eat, vomited, and sights of certain food nauseated him. So we are now two adults with appetite malfunction we look miserable with food around you've no idea :(

So I (we) have been drinking a lot of fluid coz that's the only thing that's edible and does not cause me to throw up. At least something la kan rather than leaving our stomachs empty. And I notice that we prefer flavoured drink apart from air masak to relish our brackish throats. But that doesn't make us not hungry, still *tsk!*

Whatever it is, alhamdulillah for this test. I believe Allah wants to give us something better in return and also for us to be more contemplative of what's been happening.

InsyaAllah things will be better, I hope. Nothing beats wanting your appetite back and for one to be healthy and energetic, amin!

A day off

I took my first medical leave this year today - as opposed to my resolution not to since I will be on a long leave soon. Well, I believe one should listen to her body, especially when she's pregnant. And I did just that because I didn't think I could survive a day in school today when I was awakened at 5 am.

My stomach was like a volcano waiting to erupt. It was queasy, the sound it made was unpleasant and as a result, many trips to the loo which was annoyingly tiring. I suspected diarrhea. To complete the package, I vomited a few times. By 6 am, my stomach was empty and painful. I was a weak bloated lady by then. That's when I decided I need the day off.

Had my breakfast but my stomach was still doing its somersault. I wanted to eat more but I just can't due to the queasiness. Poor baby. Went to the clinic and doctor told me it was something that I ate. At that time, my stomach was gassy due to not eating. I was shivering at one point, too. 

Drove home while eating (I was too hungry). Reached home, took my medication, breastfed Luqman and together we both dozed off till noon. I felt much better after that, and had lunch that mom prepared and felt even better.

Lesson learnt : Maggi goreng mamak with tempoyak, no matter how delicious, is not good for you; pregnant or not pregnant. 

Oh well, I believe my staying home for today has its hikmah too. Besides resting, at least I got to complete some of my pending work which is just neverending. Alhamdulillah. 

The Writer

The Writer
I am a wife, a mother, and a teacher by profession. At times a pessimist and one who is easily amused. I find comfort once entering the threshold of my bedroom. I write because I want to and it makes me feel good :)