Final rambling

This pregnancy has made me one brittle lady. It's not easy this time around. No matter how many times I told myself to get myself together, I still face countless meltdowns; of which most are unexpected.

Having a one-year-old is already so very handful. Luqman is at that phase where he is overly active, and he is now very expressive where throwing tantrums is concerned. Don't get me wrong, he is such an angel most of the time but when he decides to be difficult, well, a (pregnant) mother can only cope so much. And then I look at my growing belly, and tears start rolling down uncontrollably.

It is exhausting; being pregnant and handling a growing toddler. My whole body aches like crazy. I can't even carry Luqman without having a backache and I give-up trying to catch up with him; I lose my breath so easily. Honestly, I don't know if I can cope. So many times I remind myself, everytime Luqman is giving me a hard time remember he is actually having a difficult time himself. I am bigger and mature, so I should know better. I guess hormones are just too empowering that I get carried away.

I know I am not in this alone. I receive all the help I can get, alhamdulillah. But at times I just feel like I am in it by myself. Again, hormones. I pity those close ones who had to cope with me, instead of the youngest one in the family. Mostly, I pity Luqman who I feel deserves better from me. 

Now I feel like crying. For no reason, really.

I am not blaming fate, not at all. Complaining, yes, maybe a bit. But I know, Allah is testing me with all of these because He wants me to be a better person. He wants me to learn to be patient and realise that it is separuh daripada Iman. And most importantly, I know He wants me to realise that when I feel like everything is crumbling, He is always there to listen, for me to pour my heart out. 

After all, He is the one with the solution just as He is with giving us problems and challenges. 

And there goes my last rambling of the year.

Scribblings at 3 am

Like every other night, I am now awake at such early hour - only I decided not to go back to slumber. Watching both my heroes soundly asleep gives me such content and I like the quietness and serenity of my surrounding. Ah, such a precious me time though the bed is a temptation.

I really don't know where this is going but I just feel like typing away. I know I should probably go back to sleep since Luqman might be awake again anytime, but I think I'll just spend a few more minutes with this post.

This is humbling. This whole me time thing. It allows you to relax, to reflect and well, slack. Slacking is something that I have long forgotten what it's like since I am always on the go and on the look out for Luqman. Even now, truthfully I am constantly checking on him every second, heh. I guess mothers just don't stop do they?

I am suddenly wrapped with this overwhelming feeling which is just hard to explain. Who would have thought that come another 4 months, I will be going through again the wonderful (yet daunting) experience of giving birth (insyaAllah!). And then, I will be a mother of two. Wow, surreal. Syukur! And who would have thought that I am reaching almost a year of breastfeeding my son; while I am pregnant that is! Subhanallah! What an experience and opportunity Allah has given me. Two major things that I am going through beautifully, alhamdulillah. 

Ok, Luqman's awake! Later!


Being grateful

I am trying not to complain as much as I can because I know I shouldn't in the first place.

Tired. Well, who doesn't? We all are. 

Too much too handle. Well, always remember the ones on our plate are just a tiny portion of that of others'.

Bored. Well, we all get bored at one point of our lives. Just go and do something different that will transport you out of your boredom, no? 
Complaining doesn't change a thing. It will only make you a person with many excuses and you'll become weak. Everytime I feel like complaining (voicing it out), I stop myself. I am sure we are all quick to articulate things that displease us (guilty!) together with the sighing. Well, it does feel good to iron out the crumple but how long does the satisfaction lingers? You'll feel better but later on, you'll have this tinge of guilt creeping in. That you shouldn't have in the first place. That you might have hurt someone along the way. 

We all should feel content and blessed. Whatever that we have now, the things that we have to go through every single day (no matter how routine and mundane), cherish them. Because once they're taken away, we'll soon realise how they colour our lives and shape us, even.

They are all tests from the Almighty. The hardships, those feelings we're feeling. I believe in that. 

Stop complaining and start improving. 
(A very great reminder to self, too)

I am grateful, alhamdulillah. 

Revelation and confrontation

How do you conceal you emotions when you are faced with an unexpected revelation? That you suddenly realise you've been lied to all these while although promises had been made.

Trust is definitely an issue now. Trusting seems difficult at this point, no matter how close the two of you are. I am shocked, sad, angered maybe. Betrayed, mostly. Paranoid is what lingers around you and you seem to question every move, every whereabouts.

I know there has to be an explanation. I am sure.  

Keeping calm and being patient are the best things to do right now. Before the approach takes place.

I pray that Allah will guide me to make the best step in the confrontation.

A place called home

"Home is the nicest word there is" - Laura Ingalls Wilder

After almost 1 and a half years' of wait, we finally received the keys to our home yesterday. Alhamdulillah! It's almost surreal walking into our own home. Wow. 

Together with the person in-charge, we checked (more like hubby je) for any defects that needed to be fixed. I, on the other hand, together with little boy were busy walking around, up and down the house admiring its bare content while my mind was already busy imagining the decorations and what not.

Luqman's busy checking out our home and his favourite spot was obviously the plug

Syukur alhamdulillah everything is almost settled now. We obviously can't wait to settle in into our new abode (of course a lot of work need to ensue first). To think that we first purchased this house with absolutely no moolah and we just tried our luck, is just surreal. Scary even! Alhamdulillah, we called it 'rezeki anak' because I was pregnant with Luqman at that time, and everything was smooth and eased with a little pitch here and there. Hopefully the road to moving in will be eased too, insyaAllah - now that I am pregnant again hehe

Did I tell you I am so excited?? Yes, I did! 

Finally, a place we can call home - it's everything we can walk to :)

IKEA, here I come!

On Turning 1

In approximately 2 weeks, Luqman will be one! I was talked into throwing him his first party (initially I was thinking of celebrating just among us) and I give in. I mean why not right? 

So I am putting my planner hat on and I am so excited! It's all I can think about every single day. Nothing too extravagant. Just a simple event with cute little details and decor (no budget already haha). Hopefully it will turn out as planned.

So-called paperwork. hehe

Owh school work can wait! haha

Book shopping

Like years before, I didn't want to miss out on the most awaited book sale of the year so off I went with my brother to this year's Big Bad Wolf Book Sale at the Mines Convention Centre yesterday.

At the entrance

We arrived around 10am (we could even smell the books from the stairs leading up to the place) so the hall wasn't buzzing with people yet so happily we strolled in and got lost in the pleasure of seeing lots and lots of books around us!

We both went separate ways. I hurriedly made my way to the children's section. My main mission for the day was to grab suitable books for Luqman. It drove me crazy.

I felt like having them all. Yes, everything was just too cute and necessary (?). So what I did was to chunk everything that caught my eye in the box and sort them out later. I did a few rounds of that section leaving the box at one place and then came back later if I found anything interesting to add. The box got heavier that I wasn't fit to carry it around like I am not pregnant haha

The sorting out session

One final check

And we're ready to go!
Before paying, I went to the Cooking Section as well as the Family Section to get some books for myself. I remember years before, I only visited the Fiction Section and didn't bother about the others. Things have definitely changed, ey? Haha I just made a quick pass at the Fiction Section and consoled myself that I will come back to them later (I am saving it for a next trip with a friend!).

At the exit - resting for a minute

The Kids' Corner situated outside the hall, at the exit

After about 3 hours spent, we drove home feeling contented for the day. At least for now. 

So, what did I grab?

Happy Luqman checking out his books. We'll read them together okay little boy?

 Easy preparing recipe books - pretty much a lazy bum am I? Time is everything baby! hehe

Recipe books for kids - love them!

A baby journal/scrapbook - just felt like having it for the second baby because I had one for Luqman before. Plus, it's only RM8!

A vocabulary Power Calendar Pack. Thought it would be a great teaching aid. Now I am thinking that I should have bought more for the English Panel. It's only RM8. Hurmm

And, I bought a Big Bad Wolf shirt for my husband since he doesn't read that much and I didn't know what book to get him haha

Sold at RM29.90. There were other designs and colours available, too.

I am so happy I went. Anticipating the next trip!

Bukit Gambang Resort & Water Park

On the 9th-10th November, we made our way to Bukit Gambang Resort and Water Park for my husband's Family Day. My sister tagged along. We missed the one held last year, so we decided not to this time. We're all excited as it would also be a family excursion.

The journey was smooth, alhamdulillah, with rain pouring occasionally. Luqman slept most of the time so I got to rest my eyes, too.

I had no idea how this place would look like (didn't bother to google) or where exactly it is, so I was anxious. When we arrived, I was relieved. It wasn't so bad after all. But the ground on which the whole place is built is still bare with many constructions going on. A Night Safari is opening soon, so they are working hard on completing the place I guess.

We arrived around 3-ish, so we filled our stomach with the lunch buffet provided. By then, we were all already tired and couldn't wait to check-in into our rooms only to be faced with a very unpleasant experience which I am not going to disclose. I don't know if it was the resort's service to be blamed or it's just the bad timing and circumstance we're put under, but it definitely made me fumed. Just thinking about it makes me emotional already.

Anyway, we finally checked in to our apartment (about 2 hours later perhaps?) which was the Carribean Bay Suites Resort Accommodation. It's a 2-bedroom apartment with a private balcony.

*click here for pictures*

We rested for a while, changed and decided to join the activities held at the field but it suddenly rained so we just stayed in and got ready for that night's family dinner at the grand ballroom.

The theme for the night was Red and Black. Everyone was dressed to the nines according to the colour code, in the hopes of winning the best-dressed award I suppose. The food was just okay. Apart from that, we were entertained by that comedian who hosted Warung Kita and that actor Razali Hussin (I hope I got it right) who acts in Tiara.

I guess the kids were the ones who enjoyed themselves much. We missed the lucky draw's grand prize, though, which was a Samsung Galaxy Note II & Galaxy Tab. As for little Luqman, he was soundly asleep despite the noise.

The next day, it was out in the sun day! We were all geared up for the fun in the water so after breakfast, we hopped on the mini train that took us to the water park which was just a 3-minute drive from the lobby.

As expected, the place was already crowded with so many people. I forgot that it was not just us, but there were 3 or 4 other companies who also had their Family Day there. Plus, the public, so you could imagine the suffocation.

The whole place isn't that big if compared to Sunway Lagoon. Again, of

course, Sunway Lagoon is definitely an unfair comparison due to its years of establishment, but it's an okay alternative.

I am not really a fan of water park due to hygienic purposes so I didn't let Luqman be in the water that long. Around 11-ish, we left but not before collecting our packed lunch. We decided to leave early as we had a wedding to head to on our way back.

In case you're wondering, there are other outdoor activities that one can do here like paintball, flying fox and obstacle courses. There is even a horse carriage ride if you feel like having a mini detour around the place.

All in all, I had a great time. Will I come back again? Probably not. Been here, done that. If it's not for this Family Day, I guess we wouldn't have made our way here at all. Can't wait to see how the Night Safari will turn out to be though.

For Muslimah

As far as I remember, I haven't been going to the hair salon for God knows how long. When I was studying, I had my friends to be my hairstylist. At home, my mum willingly provides free service. And I am happy like that.

But recently, I have been feeling the need to pamper myself with a good hair wash and a hair cut. This pregnancy makes me want to chop my hair so badly to clear my head. 

Been going to Empire to this one hair salon (because it has a closed room for ladies but it is always full so every time I had to put it on hold first). Worst comes to worst, I'll just wait for my mum to come back and let her cut my hair.

Until, one fateful day, I was in the car and I saw this huge shop sign :


 You could imagine how my heart leaped. A strictly muslimah salon! How come I've never seen this before? 

So today, I made my way there. Oklah. Of course, it's not APT or Vidal Sassoon but it's okay if you feel like having a decent haircut or hair wash. I am pretty satisfied with the service and I might pay them a second visit. For a haircut and hair wash, I was charged RM40. The ambiance and overall deco are satisfactory, too. The staffs and owner are friendly people from Sungai Petani, Kedah. This salon is their third branch and they just opened it in September so no wonder I didn't really notice it although I frequent the route.

So to Klang muslimahs or others within the vicinity, you can make your way here if you feel like pampering your hair. It's in Bukit Tinggi (ok, I don't know the exact address). If you're coming from the Federal Highway drive straight following the Banting signboard, but upon seeing a fly-over after the Andalas traffic light, keep left and make a u-turn under the fly-over and turn left into the shop houses facing the main road. Search for this shop sign, you won't miss it.

Alternatively, if you're from KESAS or Banting, just drive all the way pass Aeon Bukit Tinggi until you see Premiere Hotel and Tesco on your left. Keep left and after the traffic light, make a left turning into the row of shop houses facing the main road. Search for this salon.

Or you can call the numbers advertised.

chef at home

Now that Luqman's older, his taste buds are also growing. Alhamdulillah, he doesn't seem to have any allergies towards any food consumed yet so far so preparing food for him is a breeze.

So, I have been cooking up varieties of recipes to suit his appetite and I am enjoying the fact that Luqman loves them all! And boy, he is such a big eater! 

This holidays I have prepared all his meals (breakfast, lunch and dinner) myself, alhamdulillah. This gives me satisfaction as I can provide him with the best meal and hopefully will give him healthy benefits.

Below are just some of the meals prepared which I managed to snap. Just feel like sharing. I know they are probably simple and nothing out of ordinary, but it's my air tangan. Am proud of it :)

clockwise :

1. spaghetti in homemade chicken ball soup
2. Mickey-shaped pumpkin pancake/lempeng with unsalted butter spread
3. Batted chicken with bread crumbs, mashed potato and steamed broccoli
4. Banana pancake/lempeng 
5. Fried spaghetti with salmon and mixed vege
6. Lumpy rice, mixed-vege soup with celery, and fried ikan tenggiri 

Alhamdulillah, they all turned good. Some of the recipes are my own alterations from the recipes I found from the internet and online groups which I joined. They are really helpful.

I cooked most of the meals using either unsalted butter or Virgin Coconut Oil. They add on to the taste Yes, they taste good coz I have tried myself hehe

Enjoying his food with gusto!

The Writer

The Writer
I am a wife, a mother, and a teacher by profession. At times a pessimist and one who is easily amused. I find comfort once entering the threshold of my bedroom. I write because I want to and it makes me feel good :)