reality check

It was one of those conversations when you know you've touched a chord and that it made perfect sense because nothing is sure when the future is concerned.

I finally told Rizal one of the things that I fear most once we get married--if I won't be able to conceive and produce us a descent which is the ultimate reason why man and woman decide to get married in the first place.

I was afraid of bringing up this issue before because I was concerned on where it would lead the conversation and mostly, I was anxious on what his response would be.

A nonchalant start turned out to be a quite serious discussion. I can't deny that I wasn't the least affected. In fact, the conversation left me a little affected--emotionally. The rhetorics got the best of me and at one point I could tell I was on the verge of breaking down.

I don't think I am over thinking nor am I being dramatic. We can never be sure, can we? It is just one of the things that bug me until I do something with it. I was quite happy that I confronted him and braved myself to even discuss something as serious as that; although parts of the conversation weren't too pleasing for my ears' liking. But hey, I asked, and he gave me (what I hope) were genuine answers.

I pray to You--and I pray hard. For we can only plan, but it is You who dispose.