me against the world

Today didn't turn out as normal as always. I was in a foul mood that even petty things triggered my hormones (and there went my temper) and I hate almost everything that I had to do or anyone that I saw for that matter.

I didn't feel like talking to anyone and that was pretty obvious I guess. I ran away from the bilik guru and tried to stay away from any teacher. A recluse, I was, for unfathomable reasons.

It was also hard going into classes considering how badly I wanted to be alone and refused any contact with any beings. And I felt bad for them students for I know I should have treated them better. It's the lashing again, but it was partly their fault too. Siapa suruh kau orang panjat keluar tingkap main2 dekat balkoni? What a stupid way of trying to be funny. Wrong timing.

It felt like it's me against the world today. Everything was not right.

Worst thing is, there's this sick feeling that's been building up inside me everytime I look at her. I want to run away, but apparently I can't.

Astaghfirullahal-azim... Ya Allah, lapangkanlah dadaku, hilangkanlah resah gelisah di hati ini...
Amin ya rabbal alamin...