Our "me time"

We've heard too often about "me time". The minute you become a parent, everything changes. That quiet moment in a coffee shop, the lazy Sunday morning lie in or a cheeky last minute weekend getaway are all distant memories once your little bundle of joy arrives. That said, nothing can replace the sense of love and happiness you experience when you become a parent. All of a sudden, your world is turned upside down. It seems as if your every moment, awake or (rarely!) asleep, is shared with this new little being. "Me time" is like being craved or longed for even if it's just a moment in the shower or a 5 minutes trip to the store. At one point, it's just impossible, don't you think?

My first "me time" was when Luqman was just 3 months plus I think. I needed to get out and be alone for awhile. I seeked refuge at the nail parlour. You see, longing for that moment alone or for some peace and quiet where no-one can find you, does not make you a bad parent, you need to have some time for yourself too in order to recharge and be the best parent and partner you can be. I am sure all of us do have that parent guilt so to speak but having our "me time" is equally important.

I am lucky in the sense that I do get my "me time". You just need to be able to manage it. Sometimes, during weekends I wake up early to have my coffee fix undisturbed with a book in my hand. On a daily basis, I try to get home early from work so I could have at least an hour on my own before I fetch the kids. Besides, monthly meet-ups with my besties are scheduled for another awesome "me time". The most rewarding "me time" if you ask me would be when your husband willingly looks after the kids while you take a short nap upstairs. Nothing beats that!

Now that Luqman and Adeena are older, my husband and I tend to get our "me time" every now and then. Sometimes, I don't know whether to be really thankful or feel guilty for letting them have their weekly sleepovers at their Atok's (granddad and grandma insist!) But I can say that it is such a blessing because my husband and I can have our couple time, do whatever things we have been wanting to do but we couldn't because the kids take so much of our time and attention (ie: sleeping like a log), and just relax; have a time-off from being a parent even if it's just for a day. In short, it's like we're taking care of ourselves now. We've learned to shed off the guilt and the feeling of selfishness because I personally think that it is crucial to create a more balanced, calm and happier life.  

Being a parent often means that our own needs come last, and sometimes that means we completely kick them to the curb. Most of us have been there. But if you don't already do it, try and find guilt-free "me time". Search and crave for it. 

I quote,

  "When you treat yourself well, goodness trickles down into your relationships with your partner, your kids, your friends, and your community. It’s like a big circle of awesomeness."