postpartum weight

Every woman who delivered would have at least one common thing in mind; to shed their pregnancy weight pronto. Me, included. 

I remember putting on so much weight during my first pregnancy that I actually worried about not getting back to my pre-pregnancy weight.  But I guess I am among those who don't seem to have problem with that (much to my surprise). I have to thank the corset that I wore and breastfeeding of course, for letting me get back to my ideal weight. 

However, it took me awhile to shed those fat. Face it, we put on weight for a duration of nine months prior and it's not going away overnight, isn't it? Plus, as a first-time mum, we need to recover from childbirth that losing weight immediately isn't such a good idea. I didn't go on a fad diet (I didn't even have time to even think of dieting). Like I mentioned, breastfeeding really helps in shedding my weight. 

Then, the second baby came along. I was quite confident that I would eventually get back in shape, in which I did. The corset and breastfeeding were  (again) my plan. No dieting, no exercising. I continued to eat healthy and watched what I consumed in order to be energetic and be the best milk supplier to my babies. In fact, I had enough on my plate to constantly be active. Handling a toddler and a newborn is definitely an exercise of the physical, emotional and mental. 

And, the pregnancy weight just went off like that. Now, no pregnancy pooch, no wriggly thighs and arms. In fact, I am very much surprised at how 'normal' my postpartum body looks. No stretch marks, too, if I may add. 

Before you mums start to roll your eyes and babble on what a show-off I am, let me just clarify one thing. The fact that I lose so much weight this time around makes me concerned a little bit. I didn't realise that I am way lighter than my pre-pregnancy (and even pre-marriage) weight until more than 5 people actually commented of how skinny I looked. Yes, skinny. And to me, that word was enough to make me alarmed and I went on the scale for the first time in months and got myself a surprise. The number that appeared was the lightest that I have ever been in my entire adult life!

While some people might rejoice with such weight, I didn't. I became so concerned that I actually thought I might be sick. I was very much affected. My BMI showed that I am underweight. The fact that more and more people kept on commenting on how thin I have become didn't help at all. 

The thing is this; it is definitely out of my control and beyond my expectation that I would finally come to such physical state. When asked, the only reply I would repeatedly give is breastfeeding. And that is totally it. Exhaustion? Yes, maybe. But no, I do not go on a crash diet. And it hurts when some actually gave such remarks. I was down for a couple of weeks and meeting people became a forced thing. I was worried and embarrassed that people would comment on how I look. 

But fret not. I regained my confidence and I am now taking a positive outlook on things. For one, I should be more than grateful that I am actually healthy and my weight is one that others are silently wishing for. Second, I am still active, running here and there. Third, I don't have to worry about dieting and I can stuff my mouth with whatever I feel like eating (of course taking into account the healthy meals). And of course, last but not least, I know myself and my body better so any negative remarks will be flushed out. 

Yes, I admit I do look thinner but I am not scrawny and frail-looking. My husband has a nice and funny way of putting it; budak gemuk yang kurus. 

For now, I am trying to put on a few kilos to get into the ideal weight group. Other than that, I am just one thin, happy mama :)

Luqman's allergy test

A few weeks back, my husband and I were alarmed by those red blotches that suddenly appeared on Luqman's skin. Having never to deal with such situation before, I, for the most part, was scared to death. To me, those blotches were just terrible and from the way Luqman's been scratching the spots, I can only imagine the itchiness felt. 

We didn't go to the clinic immediately. We took off his pyjamas, bathed him in cold water, patted him to dry and applied some virgin coconut oil all over his body before putting on his pyjamas back. The redness subsided within 30 minutes but from our monitoring that night, those blotches seemed to appear at some other spots on his skin. We had to be on the lookout throughout the night just so Luqman doesn't scratch himself. The next morning, his skin was clear, much to our relief. However, within the next few days, the redness came and went, but it wasn't as severe.

We were just clueless. It wasn't his eczema attacking because the symptoms weren't so. As much as I hate to admit it, I voiced it to my husband, that Luqman's skin is probably reacting due to some allergies. We did bring him to the clinic and showed the doctor the pictures we took of the redness (because there weren't any on his skin at that time), and both doctors confirmed that it is due to allergic. 

ALLERGIC. One word enough to make my heart dropped. Dealing with his eczema is already challenging enough, and now this? My husband was more positive on his outlook by saying that it is probably not that bad.

 So after our visit to his paediatrician, we decided to end the teka-teki and booked an appointment for a skin prick test to determine his allergy. Luckily for us, Luqman's paed is also an allergy expert who does research in that field. He was the one who suggested for Luqman to take the test.

So last Wednesday was the day.

I was all ready but at the same time nervous. Luqman was being his usual active self but I knew things will change once we are in the room. And I was right. At the call of our number and upon entering the paed's room, Luqman actually stopped and said no. To him, entering that room meant a 'gift' is on the way. Little did he know, he will be getting 16 pricks that day *tsskk!*

My husband carried him inside and he held onto him like it's his life he's holding on to. He refused to look at the doctor at all and as a mother, it was enough to shatter my emotion. 

 When we took of his shirt, his mouth started to shiver and his grip got stronger. 

Anyway, a little bit about this prick test. It is a test where 16 allergens will be applied on the back of the body. Prior to this test, no medicine especially flu and cough syrup to be consumed so as to validate the test. Once the allergens are applied, each one will be pricked so that the allergens can react to the body. Which ever allergens showed redness and the skin is elevated, that means one is allergic to that allergen. 

The back of Luqman was numbered so that the allergens will be easily identified. He didn't let go of his grip throughout the time.

I mean, who wouldn't right? His cries were just heart wrenching but they stopped once the doctor was done with the test. I have to say, our Luqman is one strong boy. He aced it even if his cries were just a show haha I guess it's the fear of having someone taking charge, not so much of the pain.

We had to wait for about 20 minutes after that to see the results. My heart drummed so loud I could literally feel my chest thumping. When the time finally arrived, as expected, Luqman refused to go into the room again haha This time, it was me he clanged onto. 

When the paed took a look at his back, he confirmed that yes, Luqman is indeed allergic to two things :

Who would have thought??? All these while we were pretty sure that he's allergic to dust mites.

My mind immediately transported to that time when the redness suddenly appeared. I didn't think I had consumed crab or peanut that day or the day prior that could have triggered his allergy, but such test won't lie doesn't it?

So there. Now that we know the cause, we know how to rectify the problem. Anything peanuts and coloured seafood are to be avoided by me (as long as I am still bf-ing him) and Luqman. The paed also mentioned that these allergens might have triggered his eczema, too. But because Luqman has sensitive skin, a minor bite can cause a terrible swelling and redness; papular urticaria (I have talked about his type of eczema before). However, his allergy is nothing too serious. Just a mild one but it is worth taken care of so as not to land him in a worse condition. We were also advised to do this test annually up until he is 6 years old just to check whether or not his allergy gets better or worse. 

For now, everything seems to be good. But the scorching hot weather these days kinda takes a toll on his skin. The heat causes him to sweat, and the sweat causes itchiness on certain parts of his skin that in turn makes him scratch and the end result is redness. Poor boy. We have to constantly apply moisturiser to lock the moisture on his skin so that the dryness can be avoided.

To those of you who think that your kid might be allergic or is constantly sick, down with flu and what not, I'd suggest you take this skin prick test. Your kid might be allergic to something. Even if he is not, there's nothing to lose if the test comes out negative. At least, you have one thing to be relieved about.

pain, pain go away

I haven't been sick for quite sometime, so when I was down with a major MAJOR dental pain, I was helpless. It was so terrible that everytime the pain jabs, I can only cry. And that's a lot of tears wasted.

It all started on Sunday when I woke up with an uncomfortable feeling of the gum. And then almost immediately it started to swell and I could feel that my temperature increased alongside with the pain. I thought it was just panas dalam and didn't give it much of a thought. I drank so much fluid I became bloated you have no idea. I still gorge down solid although I had to cringe everytime food enters my mouth and down my throat.

Then I started to look funny. My right side of the face swelled big time, right until my neck, just above the throat. Swallowing becomes a terrible chore and I could't open my mouth without wasting anymore tears. That night, after Maghrib off we rushed to the clinic.

I was fighting back pain while waiting for my turn. I couldn't even entertain Luqman properly as I was totally weak. The pain was just unbearable. When we went in, I tried so hard to open my mouth wide enough for the doctor to torch the inside of my mouth but to no avail. After the second try, I gave up. I just couldn't. 

Apparently, it wasn't ulcer as I had assumed. Rupanya gigi geraham bongsu nak tumbuh! Apparently it takes 11 years later to finally say hi. People say it will come out when you're 18 tops. I don't know about that. No wonder it was so painful!

It was downright painful. Made me realised and be grateful for His nikmat. Tarik sikit nikmat sihat, tak boleh makan, perit sangat rasanya.

So I have been on leave until today. Went to the dentist earlier to do my check-up and she said my gum suffered terrible swelling but it is normal. I just need to rinse well and survive on semisolid for now. The pain is subsiding and I am starting to look normal already haha Hoping that I will recuperate soon. So many events this weekend that I just can't miss the food galore!

13 months

That's how long Luqman's been fully breastfed, alhamdulillah. I never thought that we would have come that far but we did. You'd know that I had stopped pumping at the 10th month due to my pregnancy and alhamdulillah for the sufficient EBM that Luqman still got to taste Ummi's golden liquid up until he turned a year. To be able to provide him for such a period of time is more than enough and I am more than thankful for the opportunity and experience. My breastfeeding journey with Luqman is definitely challenging but it is priceless and beautifully charted nonetheless. The bond is just unexplainable and I would never trade that for anything else.

It was never easy getting over the fact that he is no more exclusively breastfed, but I believe in God's doing. 2 weeks before the last packet of EBM was consumed, I was in a state of a tangled mind. Breastfeeding mums would understand that feeling. I wanted the best for my dear son. Yes, fresh milk is now an option but I told myself, there's no harm in trying to get the best option. 

So, I decided to search for a wet nurse (ibu susuan). My husband was more than supportive while my parents weren't too keen. To cut things short, everything was eased. Allah showed me the way and he granted me one. I can never be more thankful for such rezeki. 

She is a dear friend and a sister whom I have long known and we are closely acquainted. She had just given birth at that time and I approached her. Her respond was that of a big fat yes that I was overwhelmed for a while. Alhamdulillah. My worries were immediately swept away. 

Luqman's ibu susuan - Kak Azlina and her son, Ali

However, God has better plans. After almost a month providing for Luqman, she told me that she can no longer do so. I respect her decision and her reasons and the fact that she felt sadder than I was just made me cry. Such a beautiful soul and I thanked her from the bottom of my heart for even willing to share her milk with my son.

Luqman with his little 'brother', Ali

So yes, I still breastfeed him; occasional breastfeeding, if there is such term. He now drinks fresh goat milk. Everyone knows it's the second best after mum's. Alhamdulillah, Luqman doesn't seem to reject it and so far he has developed no allergies whatsoever. And alhamdulillah, too that he doesn't show any signs of weaning. He is still attracted to Ummi's hehe

I plan to continue breastfeeding him even after I have delivered. Hopefully up until he is 2 years. I know my journey will be more challenging after this, nursing two child at once. But I am up for it. InsyaAllah everything will be eased and I pray that I will be able to provide the best to the both of them and that Allah will grant me sufficient golden liquid, amin!

To all breastfeeding mums out there, don't quit! Yes, it is never easy but do it for our babies :)

A day off

I took my first medical leave this year today - as opposed to my resolution not to since I will be on a long leave soon. Well, I believe one should listen to her body, especially when she's pregnant. And I did just that because I didn't think I could survive a day in school today when I was awakened at 5 am.

My stomach was like a volcano waiting to erupt. It was queasy, the sound it made was unpleasant and as a result, many trips to the loo which was annoyingly tiring. I suspected diarrhea. To complete the package, I vomited a few times. By 6 am, my stomach was empty and painful. I was a weak bloated lady by then. That's when I decided I need the day off.

Had my breakfast but my stomach was still doing its somersault. I wanted to eat more but I just can't due to the queasiness. Poor baby. Went to the clinic and doctor told me it was something that I ate. At that time, my stomach was gassy due to not eating. I was shivering at one point, too. 

Drove home while eating (I was too hungry). Reached home, took my medication, breastfed Luqman and together we both dozed off till noon. I felt much better after that, and had lunch that mom prepared and felt even better.

Lesson learnt : Maggi goreng mamak with tempoyak, no matter how delicious, is not good for you; pregnant or not pregnant. 

Oh well, I believe my staying home for today has its hikmah too. Besides resting, at least I got to complete some of my pending work which is just neverending. Alhamdulillah. 

low BP

I went to the doctor today to get myself checked. I didn't plan on not going to work today, but somehow this morning I felt really really tired that I decided to just rest at home.

And surprise surprise! Doctor said that my blood pressure is low, which explains my recurring condition. It's been 2 weeks I have been feeling exhausted, that sometimes I fell asleep before Luqman.

School's been hectic. This week's a winner. I have been coming home like I'm working a 9-5 job every single day. And I am Luqman deprived. Time spent with him is less this week that I feel really bad.

Doctor said that my body is too tired. And I need to eat properly. I admit, this week my eating schedule has gone a little haywire which is why.

And I thought I would be spared from low BP because during my pregnancy, I was clear.

Mum says that's how it is. Once you're a mum and you have a little kid to look after, you will never get enough rest. There are just so many things to handle that most of the time, your own priorities get a back seat.

I don't know why, but the way she said those words touched me.

Anyway, it's time for me to freshen up, eat right, and probably start taking my functional beverage again - a supplement which I have stopped taking for a month (much to husband's dismay hehe)

hair fall

I have been experiencing a very terrible hair fall for the past month.

In fact, it started ever since Luqman has mastered the skill of bubbling (fact or fiction?) - only this time it has gotten worse. My hair fall is so terrible that it has become unmanageable and is such a nuisance I feel like going bald.

The elders say that once your baby starts to bubble, the mother will experience hair fall. It did to me, but I'd like to think that it's just pure coincidence. The fact is, it has got to do with hormones.

I got myself a haircut but the hair fall still persists. So, pasrah je lah. But I got tired of daily cleaning of the floor as it is such an eye-sore to see strands of hair everywhere. The fact that my bedroom tiles are white does not help at all.

I hate the time when I wake up - segumpal rambut di bantal. I hate it when I pull off my scrunchy - segumpal rambut juga gugur! And especially when I wash my hair - a sight which is just not pretty. If I were to collect all those strands, I would have come up with a wig of my own. I definitely can feel my hair is thinning *sob sob*

So! I decided to get myself the zinc supplement which was suggested by my friend yesterday (finally!).

It is the Bio Zinc Blackmores Dietary Supplement.

I didn't know which one to get since my friend told me any zinc supplement will do (she's a doctor so I hold on to her words!) and insyaAllah will not affect my baby upon consuming, so I grabbed the aforementioned bottle mainly because of its familiar name and its cheap price compared to the others :)

It contains 90 pills so it will last up to 3 months (it's a once-a-day-dose). It's only my second day so I can't really tell whether or not it works. I will definitely review it later on.

In the meantime, Blackmores, work your wonders! InsyaAllah :)